Thursday, February 3, 2011

The Incredible Shrinking Member?

About 6 weeks ago, a 50-ish male presented to me for his first ever visit to a psychiatrist. He wouldn't tell the nurse why he needed to talk to a doctor. That's usually a warning that something very violent or funny is going to happen soon. Luckily, it was the latter.

He said to me, right off the bat, "Doc, my d!(k is shrinking! When I went to prison, I had a solid 9 inches. When I got out, the best I can do is 4 inches!" He went on to explain how he's been out of the pen for 3 years and hasn't been with his wife because he was too embarrassed. He bragged about his prowess prior to being incarcerated. On and on about the shrinking worm. He was clearly not psychotic, but did have some problems with irritability and moodiness. Also, he had the following things in his history that could contribute to erectile issues: 20 years of meth use, one MI, and type 2 diabetes. At that time, he had no insight into how those things could have affected him.

He said the reason he came in was because his PCP thought he was crazy. I emailed the PCP and ask that she please refer him to urology (why she couldn't figure that out, I don't know). I saw him about 6 weeks after the initial visit. This time, he admitted, "I think all those years of doing speed are what did this to me." I asked him if he was involved in NA or AA. Of course not, but he was thinking about getting active.
I told him he needs to go to NA and tell all the guys there to put down the pipe or your manhood could pay the price. He should go on a scared straight campaign to local high schools. He admitted that would be a good idea. Nothing should motivate a guy more than this predicament.
And this blog post is my anti-drug statement of the day.

-Psych Doc

3 comments:

RehabNurse said...

Amen, brother!

And if you told them heart health = sexual health, so drop the smokes and high fat diet, you might get their attention, too.

It's being the ladies man vs. poster boy for McDonalds/heart attack/diabetes.

SerenityNow said...

The penis is a muscle. If you dont use it you will loose it.

Men...when you masturbate be sure to be at full salute (full muscle usage) or else you will train your flag to be at half sail.

ER Doc

minimedic said...

The picture you used for thus post? CLASSIC!