Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Medical Dictionary (SEE COMMENTS SECTION FOR EVEN MORE!!)
















I was talking with my ER friends about the interesting slang patients use for various diseases/conditions/things, and thought I'd share them. Please respond with more interesting translations!

High Blood = Hypertension

Low Blood = Hypotension

Risings = Abscess

Fell out = Syncope

Double Pneumonia = Bilateral Pneumonia

Hydrocortisones for pain= Hydrocodeine

Spider Bite= Abscess

The Sugar = Diabetes

Vomicking = Vomiting

Wet= THC cigarette dipped in formaldehyde

Square= normal cigarette

Blunt= Marijuana

5s = Regular Vicodin

10s= Stronger Vicodin

"Hi Anal Hernia" = Hiatal Hernia

Thick Blood = High Cholesterol

The Shakes = Seizures

"My Girl Got Me" = STD

The Drips = STD

Fibromyalgia = Undiagnosed psych disorder

-Doc Sensitive/ER Doc

36 comments:

Mrs. L said...

Smilin' Mighty Jesus -- Spinal Meningitis

Dan said...

himolodges=hemorrhoids

Patti said...

Fireballs on my eukerist - Firbroids
Peanut butter balls - phenobarbital

KH said...

Marissa-MRSA
The Hiney shot-H1N1 vaccination
Done fell out-syncope

Anonymous said...

sick as hell anemia = sickle cell

Anonymous said...

These are great! Thanks for adding more. Doc sensitive

Bubba said...

Bar Bitch - Barbiturates
The Drop - Urine Drug Test
Inborn Hemorrhoids - Internal Hem.
Tubalisation - Tubal Ligation
Jingle - To Urinate
Blow Test - Spirometry

Anonymous said...

Water pill= lasix
I be paining= I am hurting
PCP= an illegal drug and not their primary care provider
up in it= having sex

Diana said...

Prostrate = prostate
Dana Fiber = Dana Farber Clinic
Limp nodes = lymph nodes

Trust us....we're doctors said...

Old Timer's - Alzheimer's
Zantac - Xanax
Quell - Seroquel
Primo - Weed laced with PCP
Hydroponic - Really good weed
Satan - Psych Doc
My (wife/husband) says I'm bipolar - Not bipolar
I think I'm bipolar - I wanna get on SSI and get a check

- Psych Doc

Lisa said...

Fibromyalgia jokes are getting old.

You try living with constant pain, going about your life, caring for your children and your husband, working too.. hurting all the damn time, sometimes so much that you can barely move.

Unfortunately, the meds are even worse so I'm left with a choice of pain or being stoned out of my mind on narcotics. No choice really.

But I guess I'm just an undiagnosed psychiatric patient to you.

VetRN said...

SAS = "Sick as Shit"
FDGB = "Fall Down Go Boom" (as in
what old ladies do in the
middle of the night when they
get up to go to the bathroom)
FTD = "Fixin' to Die", also known
as "circling the drain"
Past One's Expiration Date = beyond
the point where life is
enjoyable or productive, or
one who is being maintained by
extraordinary measures.

Doctor D said...

By the way "Low Blood" is also Anemia in a lot of places.

Roaches = Cirrhosis

MattersRN said...

Epidermal=Epidural in L&D

StorytellERdoc said...

LOL...how about Syracuse Veins = varicose veins and Bafroom= hmmm, I wonder. have a good weekend, all.

Trust us....we're doctors said...

I do believe that patients with FM feel real pain. But I think that it involves a lot of repressed anger/suppressed anxiety. Also, FM does seem to be more prevalent in certain personality types.

I encourage anyone with FM or chronic pain to read "The Mindbody Prescription" by Dr. John Sarno. It just might work for you.

I was a young healthy person who lived with what I thought was a pinched nerve in my lower back for about 12 years. Even had a laminectomy. I read this book and I am cured. Even the "crazy aunt" in my family, with FM, TMJ, IBS, plantar fasciitis read it and it fixed her.

I'm not saying it's perfect but it may work for you.

-Psych Doc

Anonymous said...

These are great! I passed out yesterday and had a hypoxic seizure, but I think I'd rather say I "done fell out and had the shakes!" Makes me wish I'd gone with the paramedics and had the chance to say it to the ER doctor. Ah, the vagaries of timing and insufficient insurance!

Anonymous said...

Fibromyalgia is b.s. It's a version of conversion disorder and would suggest not telling an ED or family doc that you have it bc you will never be taken seriously. Just tell them you are depressed. Just a suggestion bc haven't met too many MDs that really believe fibromyalgia is real.

Doctor D said...

Anonymous 9:43,

I'm a Family Med doc who also works ER and I don't think Fibromyalgia is BS.

Just because we can't see it in a lab test doesn't mean somebody doesn't hurt. Of course, people in pain are gonna act wacky. Have you ever had a normal conversation with a person with an open fracture?

All pain is psychologically modulated.

It may be a different kind of pain that requires a different kind of treatment, but calling someones symptoms BS is a good way of making an ass of yourself and missing important clinical cues.

Anonymous said...

Fibromyalgia is the modern version of chronic fatigue syndrome. To me, it represents a psych disorder that needs to be treated like depression or anxiety. If you poked on 100 peoples "tender" points then 95 percent would jump. It's ridiculous.

Anonymous said...

Ok, off topic a bit with the fibro conversation.

Stigmata- astigmatism

Anonymous said...

Nipshin Fits - Epileptic seizures

Morfandite - Hermaphrodite

Anonymous said...

grandma seizure= grand mal seizure

Anonymous said...

Cpack=CPAP fleem=sputum

Anonymous said...

Sensational Diabetic=gestational diabetic
I'm here for my seduction=I'm here for my induction (on L&D)

Sarah said...

Granolas = granulomas (sarcoid)

Anonymous said...

Sad that I understand the terms before the translations. LOL

I get a lot of people that say

Old Timers-Alzheimers
The Sugar with the shots-Insulin Dependent DM
The runs aka THE diarrhea
All stopped up-constipated
Sara Hostess -Cirrhosis
Mammy Gram-mammogram

Jess said...

C. Mule = C. Diff

(Stated while standing right enxt to me, talking loudly on the phone at the nurse's station because the phone in her room "wasn't working")

Anonymous said...

piles-hemorrhoids
heart hiccups-Atrial Fibrillation
Dtib- internal Dibrillator
booger sucker-yankeur
diabetic take assosis-DKA
the burns- Herpes
DNA- DNR

Anonymous said...

diarrears- diarrhea

Anonymous said...

hyena hernia= hiatal hernia

blood clod= blood clot

two beers= a lot more than two beers

Anonymous said...

man in the boat = clitoris
boo boo = poop
come on (ex: I just came on a few days ago) = begin menstrual period

Nurse Me said...

High 5 (HIV. HI....V-roman numeral 5)

"I've got 'the stones'" (gall or kidney. Usually gallstones in my ER)

Anonymous said...

"bleeding from the Virginia" = Vaginal bleeding

Lesha said...

Make water - urinate
Get fixed - vasectomy
Hysterectomy (calling urologist) - vasectomy

donna said...

I just found this site via Dr. Grumpy.
I find it very interesting and I am
catching up. I have other health issues and I saw my PCP awhile back for pain in different areas of my body,actually, soreness. My PCP said I had alot of the 'trigger points' associated with FM and thus said I had it. I said okay, and went about my business. I did not want another health issue that would have me on more meds and more docs. I simply said, 'Not this one, don't want it'.
The soreness/pain issues cleared up in a couple of weeks and never thought about it again. I don't know if FM has other factors and being this fall into another catagory. They did say LYMES was NOT an illness and yet I tested positive. Just my experience with this DX. Again I am just playing catch-up on your site and felt compelled to comment.