Thursday, September 16, 2010
Yet Again, The Rectal Fun Continues
Ironically the day I posted the last rectal fun post, another one came in that night.
This time it was 3am and a 65 year old male! He looked like Doc Brown from back to the future. He was thin, disheveled, and had thin wirery hair. Of course he came in complaining of constipation.
Me: "Hello sir, what brings you in today?"
Crazy Old Man: "I am really constipated. I have been receiving less of my social security money lately b/c they are taking it all for child support. So I have been living off of bread and water and it has made me really constipated. It hurts really bad. I think if you just give me something to have a big bowel movement I will be fine."
Me: I didn't say anything yet, but had a really confused look on my face that this old man said he is paying freaking child support from social security. So after the long pause he said.....
Crazy Old Man: "OK, I will be honest with you. I'm not constipated. I was having vigorous anal sex with myself and now I am in a lot of pain."
Me: Totally taken aback..."What do you mean you were having anal sex with yourself?"
Crazy Old Man: "Like with a Dildo, but I am not gay."
You know the rest from here. Dildo stuck in rectum. Taken to surgery to get it out...blah blah blah. I wonder if this is the first time Medicare had to pay for a dildo removal from rectum.
Posted by SerenityNow at 7:32 PM