Stripper Juice

So a stripper comes in for a butt abscess. I respect the ladies of the night.  They work hard for their money right?  Usually they are pretty street smart. But not this dumb ho. She must be stuck on the day shift. (She put on her demographics she was a stripper so there was no secret going into the room).

Stripper Juice: "Wow your my doc. Your pretty cute. You should come see me sometime."

ER Doc: "Uhhh what brings you in today."

She immediately jumps on the bed and gets in the doggy style position, ass in the air, and pulls down her shorts leaving has her nasty thong on. The smell of a nasty river took over the room.

Stripper Juice: "I have this big boil on my butt. Do you think I got bit by a spider!?!?."

WTF?? This lady slides up and down dirty polls that other dirty strippers vaginas have slid on, puts her ass on the stage and makes a V with her legs to get a dollar bill, and rubs her shit on countless mens nasty pants, and her thought is a spider bite caused her abscess?? I know most people think a magical spider causes all boils, but I would think a damn stripper would think their disease infested profession might have something to do with pocket of pus growing on her ass.

ER Doc: "It's possible it was a spider, but more likely it was from your job. How clean is your working environment."

Stripper Juice: "Oh its disgusting."

So Stripper Juice got a nice incision and drainage.  She will now have a scar on her ass...hopefully it doesn't affect her revenue. I wrote her a work excuse that said "no stripping, poll dancing, or booty rubbing until wound is fully healed."

ER Doc