Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Perverts


A couple of male patients kind of weirded me out today. Both married med in their 50s.

The first needed a prostate exam to rule out prostatitis. He said he never had this exam done. After the exam, he thanked me and said it was the most action he had gotten in awhile, and said he couldn't wait to tell his wife that he was right... putting something in there doesn't hurt that bad. I asked that he wait until he gets home to tell her that.

The second needed a foley to measure his post void residual volume. I have NEVER met a man who enjoys getting a foley....but there is always a first. He thanked the nurses over and over again, stating that it felt so great and that he hasn't "gotten any" in over a year. He laid back and relaxed and asked for a cigarette!

No wonder I found my self washing my hands more than normal today.

-ER Doc

13 comments:

Mel said...

I can't say that I necessarily enjoyed having a Foley, but I didn't find it cringe-inducing, either. I've certainly placed enough of them to know that I was lucky not to have any real irritation afterward.

BoyGeorge said...

I bet you will never get a call from them again. Men are just like that. They use you and then they leave you......bastards!

Anonymous said...

Hopefully they were just drugged up and thought they were being funny.

Lilorfnannie said...

What on earth could make a man think that way. I am seriously having trouble even remotely fathoming the thought processes that could lead to that kind of conclusion. I'm kind of curious even, in a grossed-out, macabre kind of way.

Anonymous said...

I realize you have to write something, but I have to ask, is this really something unusual in your day? My experience is that when met with some unpleasant, embarrassing procedure, many patients will try to use humor (however lame,crude and unfunny) in a desperate attempt to deal with their unease and feelings of vulnerability. Especially this gender and age group.

DreamingTree said...

Anon: Are you serious??? I have NEVER had a patient thank me for placing a Foley, let alone insinuating sexual gratification. That is truly an "ewwwww" moment.

Gert said...

It's rare, but just as disgusting to have a patient (male or female) be happy to hear that you will manually disimpact them....and then expect you to keep doing it several times weekly rather than take their bowel meds.

Anne said...

My last day at work before I went back to school, I foleyed a gentlemen who was telling me how much he hated nurses......and then came to attention after his foley was placed

Anonymous said...

i'm a female in my 20s

Both of these sound like great fun.

Look up urethral sounding in a BDSM context ;)

Trust us....we're doctors said...

Just wanna comment on the 2nd anonymous. Humor is a defense mechanism which some people may employ in this situation, especially those with more advanced ego defenses. It may not be that abnormal.

But then again, I wasn't there. I will take your word for it that you really turned these guys on.

-Psych Doc

Me said...

Double Ew.

RehabNurse said...

Yes, this is exactly a perv kind of moment. I had one who would lick his lips every time a female nurse did his intermittent cath. He swore up and down it was not sexual, and the next minute, he'd tell you it felt "good".

Where was Psych Doc when you needed him?

These characters are at risk for more than a few things if they don't go home and talk seriously with their wives.

But they probably haven't done that in years...who know WHO else they may have done already.

If I were one of their wives, I'd be calling a counselor...and the STD clinic for some tests.

Anonymous said...

The foley comment is exactly why in my ED (whenever possible) male nurses do the foleys on males and females do the foleys on females. We get a few too many creepy sex offenders making inappropriate comments to the female nurses.