I was talking with my ER friends about the interesting slang patients use for various diseases/conditions/things, and thought I'd share them. Please respond with more interesting translations!
Low Blood = Hypotension
Risings = Abscess
Fell out = Syncope
Double Pneumonia = Bilateral Pneumonia
Hydrocortisones for pain= Hydrocodeine
Spider Bite= Abscess
The Sugar = Diabetes
Vomicking = Vomiting
Wet= THC cigarette dipped in formaldehyde
Square= normal cigarette
Blunt= Marijuana
5s = Regular Vicodin
10s= Stronger Vicodin
"Hi Anal Hernia" = Hiatal Hernia
Thick Blood = High Cholesterol
The Shakes = Seizures
"My Girl Got Me" = STD
The Drips = STD
Fibromyalgia = Undiagnosed psych disorder
-Doc Sensitive/ER Doc
5s = Regular Vicodin
10s= Stronger Vicodin
"Hi Anal Hernia" = Hiatal Hernia
Thick Blood = High Cholesterol
The Shakes = Seizures
"My Girl Got Me" = STD
The Drips = STD
Fibromyalgia = Undiagnosed psych disorder
-Doc Sensitive/ER Doc
Smilin' Mighty Jesus -- Spinal Meningitis
ReplyDeletehimolodges=hemorrhoids
ReplyDeleteFireballs on my eukerist - Firbroids
ReplyDeletePeanut butter balls - phenobarbital
Marissa-MRSA
ReplyDeleteThe Hiney shot-H1N1 vaccination
Done fell out-syncope
sick as hell anemia = sickle cell
ReplyDeleteThese are great! Thanks for adding more. Doc sensitive
ReplyDeleteBar Bitch - Barbiturates
ReplyDeleteThe Drop - Urine Drug Test
Inborn Hemorrhoids - Internal Hem.
Tubalisation - Tubal Ligation
Jingle - To Urinate
Blow Test - Spirometry
Water pill= lasix
ReplyDeleteI be paining= I am hurting
PCP= an illegal drug and not their primary care provider
up in it= having sex
Prostrate = prostate
ReplyDeleteDana Fiber = Dana Farber Clinic
Limp nodes = lymph nodes
Old Timer's - Alzheimer's
ReplyDeleteZantac - Xanax
Quell - Seroquel
Primo - Weed laced with PCP
Hydroponic - Really good weed
Satan - Psych Doc
My (wife/husband) says I'm bipolar - Not bipolar
I think I'm bipolar - I wanna get on SSI and get a check
- Psych Doc
Fibromyalgia jokes are getting old.
ReplyDeleteYou try living with constant pain, going about your life, caring for your children and your husband, working too.. hurting all the damn time, sometimes so much that you can barely move.
Unfortunately, the meds are even worse so I'm left with a choice of pain or being stoned out of my mind on narcotics. No choice really.
But I guess I'm just an undiagnosed psychiatric patient to you.
SAS = "Sick as Shit"
ReplyDeleteFDGB = "Fall Down Go Boom" (as in
what old ladies do in the
middle of the night when they
get up to go to the bathroom)
FTD = "Fixin' to Die", also known
as "circling the drain"
Past One's Expiration Date = beyond
the point where life is
enjoyable or productive, or
one who is being maintained by
extraordinary measures.
By the way "Low Blood" is also Anemia in a lot of places.
ReplyDeleteRoaches = Cirrhosis
Epidermal=Epidural in L&D
ReplyDeleteLOL...how about Syracuse Veins = varicose veins and Bafroom= hmmm, I wonder. have a good weekend, all.
ReplyDeleteI do believe that patients with FM feel real pain. But I think that it involves a lot of repressed anger/suppressed anxiety. Also, FM does seem to be more prevalent in certain personality types.
ReplyDeleteI encourage anyone with FM or chronic pain to read "The Mindbody Prescription" by Dr. John Sarno. It just might work for you.
I was a young healthy person who lived with what I thought was a pinched nerve in my lower back for about 12 years. Even had a laminectomy. I read this book and I am cured. Even the "crazy aunt" in my family, with FM, TMJ, IBS, plantar fasciitis read it and it fixed her.
I'm not saying it's perfect but it may work for you.
-Psych Doc
These are great! I passed out yesterday and had a hypoxic seizure, but I think I'd rather say I "done fell out and had the shakes!" Makes me wish I'd gone with the paramedics and had the chance to say it to the ER doctor. Ah, the vagaries of timing and insufficient insurance!
ReplyDeleteFibromyalgia is b.s. It's a version of conversion disorder and would suggest not telling an ED or family doc that you have it bc you will never be taken seriously. Just tell them you are depressed. Just a suggestion bc haven't met too many MDs that really believe fibromyalgia is real.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous 9:43,
ReplyDeleteI'm a Family Med doc who also works ER and I don't think Fibromyalgia is BS.
Just because we can't see it in a lab test doesn't mean somebody doesn't hurt. Of course, people in pain are gonna act wacky. Have you ever had a normal conversation with a person with an open fracture?
All pain is psychologically modulated.
It may be a different kind of pain that requires a different kind of treatment, but calling someones symptoms BS is a good way of making an ass of yourself and missing important clinical cues.
Fibromyalgia is the modern version of chronic fatigue syndrome. To me, it represents a psych disorder that needs to be treated like depression or anxiety. If you poked on 100 peoples "tender" points then 95 percent would jump. It's ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteOk, off topic a bit with the fibro conversation.
ReplyDeleteStigmata- astigmatism
Nipshin Fits - Epileptic seizures
ReplyDeleteMorfandite - Hermaphrodite
grandma seizure= grand mal seizure
ReplyDeleteCpack=CPAP fleem=sputum
ReplyDeleteSensational Diabetic=gestational diabetic
ReplyDeleteI'm here for my seduction=I'm here for my induction (on L&D)
Granolas = granulomas (sarcoid)
ReplyDeleteSad that I understand the terms before the translations. LOL
ReplyDeleteI get a lot of people that say
Old Timers-Alzheimers
The Sugar with the shots-Insulin Dependent DM
The runs aka THE diarrhea
All stopped up-constipated
Sara Hostess -Cirrhosis
Mammy Gram-mammogram
C. Mule = C. Diff
ReplyDelete(Stated while standing right enxt to me, talking loudly on the phone at the nurse's station because the phone in her room "wasn't working")
piles-hemorrhoids
ReplyDeleteheart hiccups-Atrial Fibrillation
Dtib- internal Dibrillator
booger sucker-yankeur
diabetic take assosis-DKA
the burns- Herpes
DNA- DNR
diarrears- diarrhea
ReplyDeletehyena hernia= hiatal hernia
ReplyDeleteblood clod= blood clot
two beers= a lot more than two beers
man in the boat = clitoris
ReplyDeleteboo boo = poop
come on (ex: I just came on a few days ago) = begin menstrual period
High 5 (HIV. HI....V-roman numeral 5)
ReplyDelete"I've got 'the stones'" (gall or kidney. Usually gallstones in my ER)
"bleeding from the Virginia" = Vaginal bleeding
ReplyDeleteMake water - urinate
ReplyDeleteGet fixed - vasectomy
Hysterectomy (calling urologist) - vasectomy
I just found this site via Dr. Grumpy.
ReplyDeleteI find it very interesting and I am
catching up. I have other health issues and I saw my PCP awhile back for pain in different areas of my body,actually, soreness. My PCP said I had alot of the 'trigger points' associated with FM and thus said I had it. I said okay, and went about my business. I did not want another health issue that would have me on more meds and more docs. I simply said, 'Not this one, don't want it'.
The soreness/pain issues cleared up in a couple of weeks and never thought about it again. I don't know if FM has other factors and being this fall into another catagory. They did say LYMES was NOT an illness and yet I tested positive. Just my experience with this DX. Again I am just playing catch-up on your site and felt compelled to comment.